But I can’t imagine how lonely and depressing it would be to view myself as nothing but a pinball, batted around by forces over which I have no influence.

Unfortunately, I can’t really agree with either. I simply don’t believe in the randomity nor my ability in life to overcome  odds. It seems that success or failure is somehow outside myself.  I agree that I would rather be pressing my nose to the grindstone and receive a windfall than sitting on the couch waiting for a never-realized miracle, but what about those (like my brother) that have always done the right things in life but apparently get screwed?

I do believe in prosperity and oddly enough suffering.  I  believe that my investments pay off but not always in the areas that I expect. I believe that despite my best expectation, I am deserving, at best, to squawk out the most meager of existence, but somehow I am surrounded by luxury greater than most of the history of the world. I believe I am blessed, and hence I am thankful–my life is not a chance nor is it by my own creation.