1. Play vulture by the stock room door and shout orders to the employee like a broker on the trade floor.
2. Create a stir about the huge deals on bananas.
3. Fill a shopping cart full of the hot item, and when someone complains about the limit, shout “limits are for hunting bitch.”
4. In the heaviest traffic aisles, ram your buggy into people’s heels.
5. Go to the toy section and find the most stressed out employee begin arguing that the paper advertised an item for two cents cheaper than it is priced on the shelf.
6. Start sprinting from one side of the store to the other screaming “the last one is mine.”
7. Find the 300 pound woman with 2 shopping carts full of merchandise and begin screaming, “damnit woman you win. I am all talk no shop .”
8. After finishing number 7, pass gas and blame her.
9. When arriving to the store find the best parking space and double park blocking as many cars as possible.
10. While standing in the checkout line, talk about how you contracted TB in the Black Friday lines last year and that you just hope to make it to Christmas this year.
